From a guest contributor...

Everyone knows the Big Ten is like the King's Landing of the NCAA.  Let's see how our fair Ls & Ls match up:  If Every Big Ten Team Were a GoT Character.

Episodes 5 & 6: Goodbye Sansa, Hello Moon Door!

I was in such shock after our fair LOW lost two members of her team in one episode that it has taken me longer than usual to recover.  Not to mention that... 

1. Lysa killed Jon Arryn! (WTF?!)
2. Lysa is bat-sh*t crazy!
3. Lysa is a screamer (per ew.com, I hear she likes it up the Moon Door)!
4. Lysa and Littlefinger (awww... L&L) got married at a wedding where nobody died.
5. Sansa is going to have to marry that creepy little nipple sucker.
6. Margaery is going to marry that creepy prepubescent Lannister.
7. Stannis has some gold thanks to Davos and the Iron Bank of Braavos.  This isn't your Clinton-era economy - you actually have to prove you can pay it all back.
8. Dany has some more ships thanks to new Fabio.
9. Yara is scared of dogs.
10. Theon is scared of baths.
11. Shae sold out Tyrion faster than that "silly rabbit" sold out her bigot boss.
12. Brann pulled a Jedi mind trick on Hodor (which took approximately one hot second) so that Hodor could take care of the LOW's first casualty.
13. Tyrion is heartbroken.
14. Tyrion is bad ass.
15. Tyrion gets another trial by combat.  

It comes as no shock that the LOS resumed her rightful position in first place.  Here's where the rest of the death pool stands after episodes 5 & 6:

Lady of Sparklefell (LOS)

Tyrion Lannister

Arya Stark

Bronn (Tyrion's knight)

Davos Seaworth

Margaery Tyrell

Lysa Tully

Podrick Payne

Talisa Maegyr (RIP season 3, episode 9)

Jon Umber

Loras Tyrell

Gendry

Mance Rayder

Gilly - baby mama

Brynden Tully - Edmuer's dad

Edmuer Tully - married during Red Wedding

Olenna Tyrell - gma

Grand Maester Pycelle - old dude with a spring in his step

Lord of Anxietyhall (LOA)

Catelyn Stark (RIP season 3, episode 9)

Sandor Clegane ("The Hound")

Brienne of Tarth

Melisandre the Sorceress (mother of the demon vag baby)

Shae

Dagmer Greyjoy (first mate)

Hodor

Osha

Qyburn

Maester Aemon

Jagen H'Ghar

Ros, that slut (RIP season 3, episode 6)

Grenn - Nights' Watchman

Meera Reed - Love Actually kid's sister

Walder Frey - evil bastard

Roose Bolton - stabbed Rob

Grey worm

Lord of Wolverine Landing (LOWL)

Jaime Lannister

Peter Baelish ("Littlefinger")

Jorah Mormont

Jon Snow

Rob Stark (RIP season 3, episode 9)

Bran Stark

Joffrey Baratheon

Jeor Mormont (RIP season 3, episode 4)

Yara Greyjoy

Lancel Lannister

Grefor Clegane ("Mountain")

Dany's knight (name TBD)

Dolorous Edd Tollett - Nights' Watchman

Jojen Reed - Love Actually kid

Thoros of Myr - Red Priest with Melisandre

Meryn Trant - King's Guard

Missandei - wicked hair with Dany

Lady of Whimsy (LOW)

Cersei Lannister

Daenerys Targaryen, hereafter referred to as Dany

Tywin Lannister

Sansa Stark

Theon Greyjoy

Varys

Samwell Tarly

Stannis Baratheon (father of the demon vag baby)

Ygritte

Balon Greyjoy

Rickon Stark

Ramsay Snow

Tormund Giantsbane - giant ginger wildling leader

Rast - Nights' Watchman (RIP season 4, episode 6)

Locke (RIP season 4, episode 6)

Sir Barriston - old dude with Dany

Daario Naharis - Fabio

Christmas Came Early (and so did Tommen)

Clearly winter is here.  Last season was all about the fire but this season is bringing more ice than an episode of Breaking Bad.  Episode 4 showed us the cold climate north of the wall and even colder hearts in King's Landing.  I'm getting a bit nipply, I mean nippy, just thinking about it so let's see what was revealed this week so we can blow this popsicle stand.

• Grey Worm is Meereen's version of Santa Claus.  He comes through the sewers with sacs of swords to wish everyone a Happy Slaughterday!  Dany now has enough collars and shackles to produce her own version of 50 Shades of Grey (Worm).  She may be too busy though... it's going to take quite a long time to introduce herself now that she is also Queen of Meereen (The First of Her Name, Daenerys Targaryen Stormborn, Khaleesi, Mother of Dragons... blah blah blah).
• Jaime visits Tyrion who proposes a new nickname - The Kingslayer Brothers!  I hope they get matching bracelets!!  Jaime also visits Cersei who is not very excited to see him since that whole "he raped me under our dead son's casket" debacle.  
• Brienne and Pod head out on a mission to return Sansa to her Aunt Lysa.  We know this is a futile adventure because Littlefinger has that on lock down.  He's on his way to his betrothed with Sansa right now!  I'm looking forward to a swell family reunion when Arya arrives with The Hound.  Just the though of Arya addressing Aunt Lysa and Uncle Littlefinger is so heartwarming!  Now that Littlefinger is in cahoots with the Tyrell's there's enough motive and money for a royal sh*tshow.  Speaking of the Tyrell's...

• Margaery is becoming more manipulative and Granny would be so proud! Informal poll - can one be a cougar at the age of 16? Tommen doesn't even know what's coming but I wish could... that's what she said.  There should really be a PSA geared towards young boys who are asked to keep "our little secret".

• If you suspected that it was Lady Olenna that spiked Joffrey's juice box, you are correct!!  But how?  A quick adjustment of Sansa's necklace was just what she needed to grab the poison-filled stone.  Consequences Lady Olenna.  There will be consequences.  Side note - was anyone else super creeped out by her convo with Margaery regarding her expertise and skills in "persuasion"?  There are some images you just can't unsee.
• Jon Jon can speak.  In full sentences.  With feeling.
• This Locke situation is making me nervous.  He was sent by Roose Bolton to kill Brann and is now in close quarters with Jon Jon.  At a minimum, someone is losing an appendage.
• Bran and the gang are f'd... I just hope it's less brutal than it was with Craster's daughter wives.  Hopefully Bran can pull another Jedi mind trick and send Ghost to the rescue.
• The White Walkers have a sacrificial alter that's not too big, not too small, but just right.  

For now, the rankings in the death pool remain unchanged, but we all know all it takes is a broken promise or a simple miscommunication for someone to gain a new title.  Lady Olenna, RIP.