Week 3 Predictions: Goodbye Ser Jorah

If we've learned anything in the past two weeks, it's that nobody is safe in the Seven Kingdoms... except maybe Joffrey who has a crossbow larger than his ego and more ornate than his flowery dresses... and Brienne of Tarth who can swing a sword faster than Hodor can say his own name... and Jojen, the new kid (aka cute little Sam from Love Actually) who can't defend himself but has a hell of a body guard and is the only one who will call Bran out for what he truly is - a warg!... and Dany who has dragons, and ships, and an army.  

So maybe some will be safe, but for the sake of the death pool, here's hoping that some of these jokers start to go down faster than a sweet muffin and as gruesome as Kevin Ware in this week's episode.  Too soon?  

Here are this week's predictions:


We haven't seen Dany in a week and the Lord of Anxietyhall is getting, well, anxious.  This week should take us back to Astapor where we last saw Dany being rescued from a creepy giant scorpion robot.  Dany has her dragons, she has her ships, she has her army (The Unsullied - thanks Krazny!), and damn it she has her pride.  Let's all pause for a moment of silence in remembrance of a nipple that once was...


Back to the prediction... Ser Jorah has been getting mouthy and I think a quick visit from the mesh-masked creepy lady from Qarth will reveal the true traitor for what he really is.  Ser Barristan Selmy might be old, but anyone who chose to protect the Lannisters has to be cold and dead inside.  He'll make quick work of the traitor making Astapor Ser Jorah's last stop on this epic cruise.  (DISCLOSURE:  In a separate, more simple death pool, I have selected Ser Jorah to be the first one out in season 3).  

Melisandre vowed to burn those who rose up against her or her nutty religion... I'm calling game over for Davos and can't help wondering if Melisandre takes requests...

The half-dead Northerner (Qyburn - also new this season and yet to be drafted) that was found by Catelyn and Robb (King of the North!) at Harrenhal may make an appearance.  I don't think he's a goner quite yet but I see him providing some key information on his death bed.  

There's been a lot of foreshadowing this season and last targeting Tyrion and a loss of someone he loves.  We heard it from Cersei last season when Tyrion sent her daughter out to sea and Tywin in this season's premiere.  There's also been a lack of lady death so I predict one of our leading ladies is going to see the losing end of a crossbow or demon vag baby in the upcoming weeks.  Talisa seems a likely contender but I can't rule out Shae, Ros, or Margaery.  We haven't seen Ygritte naked yet so she should be around for awhile and Arya doesn't seem to count.  Lady Olenna, Margaery's grandmother, seems the most likely but this would make her on-air time shorter than Kim Kardashian's marriage (side note, really Ray J, you REALLY "hit it first"? Erroneous.).  Her death will not affect the rankings so my bets are on Ros and Shae.  There's nothing more captivating than the death of a whore.